Until this weekend, I never realized how emotionally dependent I am on my parents. Because of them, home has been unexpectedly refreshing and rejuvenating.

Talking with them today about the future made me re-realize how fragile life is and why I made the decision to place my security and identity in God in the first place. I've been so caught up with the world around me lately, and I can see how it's been so draining the past couple of weeks. Sigh.

God, help me with the mistake of thinking that I can be satisfied in my walk as long as I have knowledge about You. I want to experience Your power and presence in a real way - help me have more faith.

I am not satisfied with where I am spiritually right now. I don't feel all warm and fuzzy like people typically do after retreats. No spiritual high. No transcending peace. I don't feel happy, and I don't feel rested. Instead, there's an emptiness in me that is begging to be filled... how it'll be filled, I don't know for sure. But God, show me what true restoration looks like. This world is so broken and I guess need more faith to believe that broken people can be used to fix it.